Dating for heavy people

11-Feb-2015 10:12 by 7 Comments

Dating for heavy people - black and hispanic dating services

Finding love is always challenging, but it’s especially hard in a city with tunnel-vision-like focus on appearance for someone who doesn’t match the high standards set for beauty in Los Angeles.LA is the national headquarters for the super-fit and the stunningly beautiful.

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This comes from guys who don't necessarily have a problem with my weight -- they just have a problem with fat people. " Or worse, "Oh you're so (beautiful, smart, sexy, whatever) for a fat girl…" all I hear is how much you hate fatness. "You're not the kind of lazy, stupid, disgusting, [insert sizeist insult here] slob who I expect fat people to be," is not a compliment.

These sorts of acrobatics are best attempted without the element of surprise.

I've had people tell me quite plainly that they just Um, no. I enjoy sex, I love meeting new people, and I think there is an incredible power in making intimate connections.

Dudes tend to assume that I haven't dated a lot in my life -- or the opposite, that I'm always up for casual sex because I'm desperate for attention.

They often come into a relationship believing that my past partners have been abusive or unfaithful, or that my current partner isn't interested in sex and that's why we're poly.

And yes, I even enjoy going out for a good meal if you can manage not to make a big deal out of it. There are some places, some days, when I just don't want to interact with certain people or try to make my body fit into the world.

Transit -- from buses and taxis all the way to airplanes -- can lead to downright hostile environments.

A lot of fat women have -- the ACE scores study suggest that at least some cases of obesity are biologically related to childhood trauma -- but I don't need you to psychoanalyze me, to explain to me why I'm fat, or to try and "fix" me somehow. I got over guys who wanted to sleep with me but weren't willing to be seen in public with me a long time ago.

I love Netflix and whatever as much as the next girl, sure -- but I also love art galleries and movie theaters and poetry readings! And don't invalidate my experiences as a fat woman.

Seemingly perfect-looking people flock here from all corners of the earth, whether for the lure of Hollywood glamour or the glorious weather and sprawling beaches.

Perhaps the overflow of models, actresses, and beach bunnies is contributing to Los Angeles’s perpetually landing on lists like “Worst Cities for Women Looking to Marry.” Our “norm” is a practically unattainable standard.

And then I suddenly found myself afraid to publish it so it's been in a folder for a few months.