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03-Sep-2015 16:09 by 9 Comments

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Many don’t ‘get’ the idea that anyone would not to be married.

I guess I’ve seen too many of these fairytales end badly, so I know that marriage isn’t the fix-it solution for being happy.

However, I love the idea of sharing the journey of life with a soul mate and making amazing memories together. Knowing you’ll wake up next to each other when you’re old and grey and that you’ll care for each other ’til death do us part’. So I’m not anti-marriage or anti-commitment at all, I’m just anti the idea that marriage is the solution to all life’s problems and the only goal everyone should be running after.

It doesn’t always feel like society promotes that though, with the steady media diet it feeds us of Rom Coms, the mass-commercialisation of Valentines Day and the women’s magazines full of wedding dresses.

Culture needs to start affirming that people are just as complete when single as when married.

As a Church-goer I am very keen to see the Church do better in the way it looks after its single congregation members.

But that’s very different from waiting to find someone who’s genuinely right for you, and you for them.

Others of my friends married young, as that was normal in our Christian circles. They’ve told me they walked into marriage as people who didn’t even know who they were yet, let alone who was the right partner for them.

They also told me that the Church painted too fairytale a picture of marriage and didn’t suggest they waited a while until they’d grown up a bit.

There are great marriage courses out there now, so hopefully this is less prevalent today.

I rarely discuss the topic of singleness on my blog because to me it’s not a label that I wear.

It bothers me when people categorise the world into ‘married’ or ‘single’.

No, I’m not married but I am a whole person, comfortable being me and am not waiting for anyone else to come and (a) rescue me (be) complete me (c) start the adventure of my life for me.